Yoga is a funny thing, you never know from day to day if you are going to have a good or bad class. Is any class really bad? Don't you score any "points" just for showing up? Sure...but just showing up to class doesn't benefit your body or your mind; you have to push yourself physically and mentally. For me, today was a good class. This isn't to say I completed all the postures or did every move to 100% effort but I was better physically in class today than yesterday or the day before or the day before that.
As I was coming out of the second set Triangle, it occured to me I was doing better today in the standing series than in previous classes, actually, at all since I started going to yoga on a regular basis again. It was like today was the turning point and each day after today will be stronger and more focused. I can't wait for the day when I can complete class again and still feel like I have some energy left, that 90 minutes of Bikram Yoga didn't just kick my butt. It use to be like that, where I would have more good days than bad. Sure, everyone has a bad day...didn't eat enough, didn't drink enough water, stress from work, etc., but those days come and go. In general, for me, I expect my practice to get better over time and I've been a little disappointed in myself that class seems overly difficult and more challenging than it should. But today made me think I was making progress. Can't wait for tomorrows class!
Of course, there are always the things that remind me I need to keep coming and working on "staying in the room." Like the birds. Sunday I took class and as I turned my head to the right in Savasana, I noticed there were no birds on the electrical wires outside the back windows. There are frequently birds sitting there, almost like they know there is a 90 minute show, a show where they get to watch humans sweat to death - on purpose! From time to time as I lay there I see birds fight for a good spot or the ugly duckling bird gets shoved to the end. On Sunday though, no birds. I thought to myself, hmm, they must have flown south for the winter. Not that it is winter here but you can see where the thought pattern was going.
Then today as the instructor so graciously opened the side door ever so slightly I noticed the sound of birds chirping. Again, as a laid in Savasana, the thought of birds passed through my mind. Why are the birds in the front and not in the back on the wire? Is it too cold on the wire? Maybe the tree in the front shields them from the wind? Are they the same birds? Do they chirp like that in the back on the wire? These are the thoughts that traveled through my mind as I tried to relax and be completely still in Savasana. So although my physical practice appears to be getting better, I still need some work on the mental practice!
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That is so funny. While in Savasana I work really hard at keeping my mind present but as I look up at the ceiling and focus on the little stars my mind is always going a mile a minute. Crazy how hard it is to JUST breathe. I had an awesome, strong class last night too. The teacher even said she loves my energy and how she has to keep up with ME. Was nice & hot & humid like I like it and the class was packed, mat to mat. Tons of good energy for a Monday! Sunday's class was ok, but I have found that some instructors get the energy up in the room more than others. Just the way it goes. It's weird how no two classes feel the same. Practice is always changing. That's what I love about it!
ReplyDeleteThanks Tracik! I love your comments. It is so true, breathing should be easy but it is so hard!
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